***
At lunch yesterday, my friend Brad informed me that the tattoo on my right forearm meant I was gay."Um. What now?"
"Yeah. That star is some kind of a symbol for gay." (Actual quote--"a symbol for gay," like a brand logo or something.)
Now, my friend Brad knows a whole lot about not much at all. And while he's a very good friend, he's kind of a closed-minded freak. Still, he's not a complete idiot, so I figured there had to be some sort of urban legend or arcane piece of knowledge that led him to this observation.
Yet fearing that our lunch would deteriorate into a rant about sexual politics if I pursued this further, I let it slide and moved on to safer topics. But when I got home, curiosity being my middle name, I went to the old Internets and did a search.
And lo and behold, Brad was right. Sort of.
I have a nautical star on my forearm. To my knowledge (as well as the knowledge of Dave, my talented and patient tattoo artist), this has always been an old sailors talisman representing the dead-reckoning stars that seamen used to find their way home in bad storms. It is a traditional symbol of always finding your way to your home port, and your loved ones, and in a broader sense of simply finding your way in life.
My star represents my wife and home, and I have two small, trailing stars below it, one for each kid. They know which star is theirs (Isaac right, Miles left) and think it's pretty neat that they have a permanent, visual place on dad's arm. This is for me, like, deep.
Yet, consulting Wikipedia, there's this under the "nautical star" entry:
"Historically back in the 1940’s and 50’s when alternative lifestyles were not the norm and often women had to hide their alternative choices they would sport a hidden nautical star."
Mind you, I am a man completely at peace with my sexuality, and the sexuality of others. I have a number of close, gay friends. What goes on behind your closed doors is of no particular concern to me. I even used to give money, regularly, to the Human Rights Campaign, until I got tired of all the literature they kept sending (I just didn't have enough places to put all those rainbow stickers. )
So, if I'm sporting a retro-gay icon tattoo, I'm not all that worried about it. In fact, I kind of like the idea of flashing it around to stir the pot here in Podunky. Let 'em wonder: "Well, he has a wife and kids, but he is a writer, and I have seen him shopping for pottery...."
Which leads us back to Brad. A classic hunter/gatherer in every sense and a happily married man to boot, he is not the sort to do Internet research on homosexual iconography. At least, I don't think he is. Meaning, I had to know how he would be aware of such an obscure bit of lore. I gave him a call.
"Hey. I looked up some stuff about the nautical star online. Turns out, it actually was a discrete symbol for lesbians in the 40's and 50's."
"Yah."
"So.....how did you know that?"
"I didn't."
"What?"
"I didn't. I was just giving you shit. Figured it would drive you crazy, and you'd go look it up and stuff. Probably even write about it. Apparently, I was right?"
"You're a jackass, you know that?"
"Yah. But I'm not the one with a gay tattoo on my arm."
I really think I need some new friends.
11 comments:
oh, i love small town living.
just about spewed spaghetti all over the keyboard reading that blog.
What a gift giver, Brad seems to be.
Chalk yourself up as lucky. Ironically, or not, I'm getting a new tattoo tomorrow.
And then I'm done getting them, for life. As mandated by a certain Mr. Booms.
Brad the Sage. You don't need new friends when the ones you've got know you SO DAMN WELL.
Awesome.
My mother does that to me! She'll tell me something random, then wait for me to go look it up. After that, it "comes up" in conversation, and I'm all like, "actually, you know. . . " and she just laughs.
I'm supposed to be writing too but of course I'm stalling and reading blogs.
You made me laugh and choke on my coffee. I should know better than to take a sip when I'm reading your posts.
Oh Ray, you crack me up! Only you would be sporting a retro lesbian tattoo! Nice shopw of Gay Rights solidarity, though!
A day without a Ray post is just a little grayer!
Well, all you need to consider is that the star brands you as a lesbian and that means you like women, which since you're a male, means you're perfectly hetero.
Still trying to figure out the punctuation on that one. But I think it says what I meant. At least it says something. I think.
Don't chase me. Just stick with Crazy Man. It's your best bet.
I'm in an appeasing mood. Don't take it seriously.
Speaking for my people, it's not just a lesbian icon from the 40s & 50s. Oh, no. It is a call sign for the modern les. You are so our mother ship.
(Just kidding.)
Thanks, bud. Saying I wasnt "a complete idiot" is the closest to a compliment I'll probably ever hear from you.
I'll look for ya on the Pride Float (kidding, of course).
Hey, I have often wished out loud, in front of small town folk, that I would love to be an icon from the 40's & 50's...lesbian or otherwise.
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